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52 replies
Worst movies ever
Jester
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http://www.thestinke…

This is a list I found of someone’s top 100 worst movies of the 20th century. This is not my top 100 worst movies, although I do agree with part of that list.

What are your worst movies that were not included in this list?

I’ll mention more later as I wake up, but I’ll start with the worse movie I ever saw (and I’m surprised it was not mentioned). In fact, it’s so bad I give it 50 of my 100 points: MARIO BROS.

mb
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I can’t agree with the lists first two movies. Ace Ventura and Anaconda were definately not in the 100 worst movies. Anaconda 2 maybe. It was pretty bad. I’ve had movies so bad that the video store wouldn’t give me any credit on trade in.

How can you say Armageddon was bad?

I don’t know what these guys were comparing these movies to. There’s definately much worse out there.

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

Don
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quote:worst movies of the 20th century
As opposed to, say, movies from the 19th century? (Sorry, couldn’t resist ).

Interesting link. I didn’t even know there was an Arthur 2. The first Arthur is good—definitely worth a rent; "I’m so rich… I wish I had a dime… for every dime I have."

I’d have to say "Beverly Hills Ninja" and "Jerky Boys" have been the absolute worst movies I’ve ever seen.

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Any Ben Stiller movie?

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Worst ever on the Big Screen…

1. G.I. Jane
2. Striptease
3. CaddyShack II (Caddyshack 1 was best comedy ever!)
4. Gigli (Never seen it, never will, but I heard things)
5. 2Fast 2Furious
6. Anything with Ashhole (My 15 mins are almost up)Kutcher in it.
7. About half of the Tom Cruise movies the past 8 yrs…
8. Anything that self-absorbed (horrible Director/good actor) named
Kevin Costner did, lasting over three days, which seemed like 3
months!!! Waterworld may top the list!
9. All Batman movies! The first one was maybe a 5.5 on a 10.0 scale, but none of the sequals rate higher than a -2.5.. Garbage!
10. Charlie’s Angels – I have not seen the sequal, because I am still in-shock they actually made one to this piece of monkey shite.
11. Anything with J-Ho in it.
12. Anything with Keanu Reeves as the star. He should have stopped after Bill & Ted (the first one) The Matrix 1 thru 4 or whatever – sucked big time!
13. Approx. 75% of Will Smith’s movies. I wish the Fresh Prince would have stayed on the small screen.
14. Ghost (another Demi "Way Overrated" Moore) classic!
15. Any movie ever made about teen’s falling into "forbidden love" at a dance studio or club, etc. Can you say LAME???
16. Grease… What a stinker!
17. Being John Malkovich.. Looking at one J.M. is hard enough, as he is one of the ugliest guys in the business. He makes Gerard Deparduex look handsome.. It was definately unsettling having to look at 100+ of the guy!
18. Anything Clint Eastwood has done the past 5 years or so (Bloodwork, etc.) – after his 90th birthday, when he takes his shirt off, and tries to pork a 30 yr-old hottie!
19. At least 67% of Sly Stallones pics..
20. Last, but certainly not least. Can we have a big round of applause for the worst actor in the history of film… Yes, even worse than Snoop Dog, Ice T, and Hulk Hogan… Mr. Jean Claude-Damm I can’t act or speak English… Any movie he ever did was painful and nauseating to watch for even ten mins…

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mb
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quote:
Worst ever on the Big Screen… Mr. Jean Claude-Damme I can’t act or speak English… Any movie he ever did was painful and nauseating to watch for even ten mins…

He made a movie called "In Hell" that wasn’t too bad compared to his others. At least he broke from the norm.

Steven Seagal is the one that kills me. He always dresses with the same black leather, always has his arms folded in the same way, same wrist throw, and always has the same plot.

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

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Highlander 2
Meet the Parents (maybe not a popular choice, but I thought it was awful)

Jester
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quote:
quote:
worst movies of the 20th century
As opposed to, say, movies from the 19th century? (Sorry, couldn’t resist ).

Ok, Don it does sound stupid but it could be movies of the 21st century… it’s only been 5 years, but gosh do we have enough to do a top 100 list of these past 5 years only……

There was this movie, I can’t remember the name, it was a movie made for TV, called "erotic stories" or something, and as the name says it, it had 3 or 4 "erotic" movies, directed by this Peeble Van Dyke or something like that, and one of the movies was about an enchanted motorcycle that at night would become a naked woman while the guy humped and drove her… and it looked pathetic, a beautiful woman, gorgeous body with wheels on her shoulders and ass and arms stuck up high like a handlebar… turned me off so bad……

Does anyone know of a Van Dyke that does good things?

logan
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HELLO FROM FRANCE!!!!!!!!

What about those Shaq movies,?
now those are stinkers!!!!

mb
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Alien Apocalypse – 2005

Pretty bad movie but Rosi Chernogorova is a hottie. She looked better in Shark Attack 3: Megalodon with her top off. That was a pretty bad movie too.

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

Chucko Fantastico
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Mr and Mrs Smith (tried to be true lies but failed miserably)
Fight Club (started out good, with fight club and all that, then they fucking started like raising some army then Brad Pitt and Edward Norton ended up being the same guy? Fuck that)
Wayne’s World 2

Adn being malkovich was a great movie

Sunskin
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Logan: Great point about Shaq! He may be worse than Terry "Hulk" Hogan when it comes to "acting" in some of the crap Hollywood has cast him in. Those money-hungry Producers on the West Coast sit-down and weigh the cost of a film vs. how many idiot-moronic, braid-dead, retarded Americans will actually pay to see it, and/or purchase the DVD. They do not care one bit about quality, or even if the people starring in the piece of shite has ever had an acting lesson, much less speak more than 20 or more discernable words. If the DVD and Reel have one chance in hell of making 1 million or more in sales – over the cost, they will Produce, Direct, and Market a sports star taking a dump on a 5-year old kid… The Shaq movies cannot even be considered art by Helen Keller. They are definately the worst things I have evern seen. It’s all about exploiting the dumb, and taking advantage of any teen with $20 in their collective pockets here in the good ole US of A… It does not have to be good. Moreover, the Hollywood morons with a mansion to pay-off, and thirty more Lamborghini payments, will put it out there in the stores – knowing it is really bad…

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Don
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Oh noooooo…. I agree with my fellow Eurotripper replies so far, except Meet the Parents which was a lot of fun; "You milk cats, Greg?" "Sure, you can milk anything with nipples." "I’ve got nipples Greg, could you milk me?" And Wayne’s World 2… c’mon—another really fun movie! The Village People scene alone was worth the price of admission! Much stronger than the first Wayne’s World… all of course IMHO.

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Can’t believe both the Weekend at Bernie’s were on the list, first one was laughable, yea 2nd one was crap, and as for Titanic, must admit still to watch, but everyone used to rave about that one

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The original "Weekend at Bernie’s" was good. It was a unique idea, and pretty funny. Plus, that Hampton Isle beach pad is awsome!

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Sometimes, movies are not meant to have sequals. I really liked Meet the parents and Weekend at Bernie’s but both of the sequals I hated. When will they learn??

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Yeah, I just picked up that list from the net to have a base to start this thread, some of those movies I don’t agree with. I don’t like Natural Born Killers, but I wouldn’t put it in a worst movies list along with Pee Wee’s whatever the name the movie had.

quote:
Fight Club (started out good, with fight club and all that, then they fucking started like raising some army then Brad Pitt and Edward Norton ended up being the same guy? Fuck that)

Chucko, I can’t believe you’re saying this. I didn’t dislike Fight Club as much as you did, but I have been close to being butchered for saying it’s not my cup o’ tea. Wow, I’m not alone….

What about Space Jam (is this the correct name of the movie with Michael Jordan?)

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I agree about Natural Born Killers. Woody Harrelson is medicore on his best day as it is. The movie Twelve Monkeys with Bruce Willis was just as wierd, and not interesting. A much better film (in same category) than N.B.K. was "Kalifornia" with Brad Pitt. Great flik!

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Jester
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quote:
I agree about Natural Born Killers. Woody Harrelson is medicore on his best day as it is. The movie Twelve Monkeys with Bruce Willis was just as wierd, and not interesting. A much better film (in same category) than N.B.K. was "Kalifornia" with Brad Pitt. Great flik!

Oh, this is one of those few times I agree with you, Sunskin. The ending may not be perfect, and David Duchovnic does not shine very much, but Brad Pitt and Juliette Lewis were great in that movie. And that’s when Brad Pitt won me, he showed he doesn’t have to be handsome to sell movies (DiCaprio). Good acting from both.

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WAIT A SECOND!!!! "The Village" is not on that list? I’m getting frustrated just thinking about the ten bucks I wasted on that piece of junk!!! Well in fairness the question was directed to 20th century movies. But that movie SUUUUUUCKED BIG TIME!!!

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No kidding… It was on my list of movies to watch soon…..

I don’t know why I didn’t think of this one, I guess it was so bad I erased it from my mind……

Mulholland Drive……

I’m sorry, but whoever says he/she understood that film and it’s David Lynch’s best film is clearly bluffing and too pretentious to admit he/she is only a human being.

I don’t know what crap Lynch inhaled, but this piece of shit is not worth 2 cents from my pocket or 2 seconds of my time.

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I liked Mulholland Drive although had no clue what the hell was going on through most of it.

The worst big screen movie ever made has got to be ‘Freddie Got Fingered’. I can’t believe I went to see that shite in the theatre!

The worst movie though that I’ve ever seen is called ‘Curse of the 49er’. Rented it one random day and laughed the whole way through. Its a horror.

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Freddy got Fingered sounds like cheap porn…..

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I wish it had been.

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I didn’t see "Sky Captain and the World of Tomorrow" anywhere here. I rented it, and turned it off within 15 minutes. I couldn’t figure out if it was supposed to be a normal movie, or a horrible spoof of something and was meant to be ridiculous. Absolutely horrible in everyway.

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Sky Captain was a strange one but it was better than "the village"!!!!!!! I liked that one though… not the story I was expecting but considering that it was remade all together in a couple of weeks it was a good movie.

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I kind of liked "The Village", I don’t understand why it always gets knocked. I hated how the big suprise ending became evident half way through, but I’ve seen worse, like "The Terminal"…that one put me to sleep within minutes.

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I’ll tell you what movie would NOT make this "Worst Ever" list…

I purchased a copy (DVD) of "The 40 Year Old Virgin" three days ago. I have watched it 5 times, and laughed my arse off harder each time! I seriously pulled something in my left rib-cage area yesterday, while rolling on the floor laughing! Might be funnier than even Caddyshack! I think it’s the funniest damn movie ever!!!

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Here’s my list of the 5 worst movies ever…

5. Matrix (the camera effects made it big)
4. The Hulk (big bomb)
3. Gigli (should be on everyone’s list)
2. From Justin to Kelly (haven’t seen that in this forum)
1. Napolean Dynamite (Absolutely no storyline, hard to follow, overall the biggest waste of my corn ever!)(I saw it with a deal the theater had where you bring cans for a "free" movie)

Jester
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I don’t need to watch Gigli to know it’s awful. However, I do need to watch it to be fair when I mention it, and I refuse to do that, so I’ll take your word for granted.

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quote:
Mulholland Drive……

I’m sorry, but whoever says he/she understood that film and it’s David Lynch’s best film is clearly bluffing and too pretentious to admit he/she is only a human being.

I don’t know what crap Lynch inhaled, but this piece of shit is not worth 2 cents from my pocket or 2 seconds of my time.

Actually, MD was absolutely brilliant. It was such a deep film with so many layers and it was told in such a surreal manner that it was exciting to watch even if you didn’t know what was going on. It took me 3 or 4 views before I understood the basic storyline. I’ve seen it lots of times and there’s still many parts I don’t understand, and that’s what makes it so great.

When I first seen it at the theatre, it seemed like a movie unfinished due to budget constraints or whatever, but the story isn’t told in a linear fashin.

I was surprised to see Howard the Duck and Cheech & Chong on the worst movie list, those are classics man! I think Napoleon Dynomite & My Left Foot are two of the worst movies ever made

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Wow, someone else saw through Fight Club—well done, Chucko and Jester. FC was way overrated.

Napoleon Dynamite is one of those movies that is more fun to talk about the next day than it is to sit through.

I agree with MB that there are worse movies out there.
Pearl Harbor was pretty bad.

But movies like Anaconda are at least kind of funny. You already assume they are going to be pretty bad, but they are laughingly atrocious, so if/when you rent them, you don’t feel so ripped off.

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I thought FC was great, you have to look deeper than the surface with those movies. Maybe something like Legally Blonde is more Chucko’s level.

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heavydrinker
It’s too bad the search here doesn’t work anymore.
Other people saw FC for what it was and we had an interesting discussion about here a long time ago. FC was watchable but overwrought, not to mention misogynist. For me, it is not the worst movie I ever saw, but it was definitely a letdown.

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quote:
heavydrinker
It’s too bad the search here doesn’t work anymore.
Other people saw FC for what it was and we had an interesting discussion about here a long time ago. FC was watchable but overwrought, not to mention misogynist. For me, it is not the worst movie I ever saw, but it was definitely a letdown.

I don’t have a problem with it being misogynist, the best movies usually are.

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The "Crocodile Hunter" movie was hands down the worst piece of crap I’ve ever had the displeasure of watching.

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Ouch, Clunker, why’d you remind me that retarded movie exists?? You also made me remember Cocoon (sp?) which is on the worst move list.

I agree with Cil in her Anaconda argument. Some movies you watch because they are so bad it’s going to be laughable. I just watched Kill Bill the other day, I love those movies, they are brilliant, but for some reason, I can’t argue whenever someone says it’s like a Chuck Norris Film. The arguments are great, the storyline is not that special, but it’s put together pretty neatly. But overall, when it comes to the american girl mastering the martial arts way better than the asians, blood splurting everywhere, heads rolling and things like that, it makes me think this is a brilliant bad movie. I love it.

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Jester, it could definitely be argued that Tarantino movies are style over substance. But they are so stylish!
I liked Kill Bill but prefer Quentin’s other movies, esp Reservoir Dogs.

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quote: But overall, when it comes to the american girl mastering the martial arts way better than the asians, blood splurting everywhere, heads rolling and things like that, it makes me think this is a brilliant bad movie. I love it.

Mulholland Drive had a sweet American girl masterbating sequence

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I think some of Tarrentino’s stuff is wayyyy out there! The 2nd part of "Kill Bill" was alot better than part one. I did really like Res. Dogs & Pulp Fiction.

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quote:
I think some of Tarrentino’s stuff is wayyyy out there! The 2nd part of "Kill Bill" was alot better than part one. I did really like Res. Dogs & Pulp Fiction.

Funny enough, I heard a lot of comments saying part one was a masterpiece and part two was crap. Part two had more story and answers for most questions, I also liked the second one a lot better.

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The first Anaconda wasn’t too bad. The second one was

"Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid"

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

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….and there was this movie called "Eurotrip".

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

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"Eurotrip" was ridiculous, but I laughed pretty hard.
I seem to be very much in touch with my inner adolescent.

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My vote for the worst movie ever belched out of a director is:

Tarzan, The Ape Man (1981)
Director: John Derek
Starring: Bo Derek, Richard Harris, Miles O’Keefe

Absolutely painful to watch.

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quote:
My vote for the worst movie ever belched out of a director is:

Tarzan, The Ape Man (1981)
Director: John Derek
Starring: Bo Derek, Richard Harris, Miles O’Keefe

Absolutely painful to watch.

Except for Bo’s chest.

Eat the food, use the wrong verbs, and end up getting charged double.

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Absolutely hands down the 2000 remake of Get Carter starring Sly Stallone (has any other actor ever made such a long career trading on the success of one okay film in 1976?) The original with Michael Caine was a work of genius set against the backdrop of urban Newcastle Upon Tyne in 1971 and nicely broke the Hollywood conventions by having a grim and downbeat ending. The remake was a pointless travesty and setting it in Seattle was never the brightest of ideas.

As for Fight Club, it’s one of the best films ever made.

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F.C was shite!

Big, big hole was the fact that Tyler Durden was causing the insomnia in Jacks life after it returned when he met Marla at the support group meetings…. what was causing the insomnia in the first place before he started going to the self support groups before Marla? Before Tyler Durden entered his life ??

If you can grasp this which you probably can’t, oh, forget it!

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Tyler Durden wasn’t the cause of Jack’s insomnia, Tyler Durden was his insomnia. Durden (his alter ego if you will) was a manifestation of his insomnia, his physical representation. When he met Marla at the support groups he lost his ability to cope with his ailment, hence he created Durden. His insomnia came from his declining mental state and Durden was the result of his eventual mental collapse.

Was that far enough beneath the surface for you heavydrinker?

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Okay smart arse,

how many times does Tyler appear (and he does) before the intial meeting on the plane, I’m betting you’re too dim to know or ever figure it out?

There are fleeting appearences of Pitt in the movie before the plane scene, question you have to answer is are any of them BEFORE he meets Marla ??

Sorry but if he is a manifestation of his insomnia then he (Durden) should have made an earlier ‘introducted’ appearance, this insomnia was already an established case beforehand

I’d like to here your theory on mental/sleeping disorders as to why he delayed appearing in the narrators life.

Frankly I think you’ll start bullshiting me and make some serious lame crap up.

Why did Durden appear when he did? Go back and watch the movie or read the book, the lesson is to understand why he appeared?

BTW: there’s nothing in this for women, it’s an examination of the male psyche which all men suffer, me included!

An therein lies the really big question, Marla, was on the same trip as the narrator, we never know what her mental fuck-up or crutch was, I’m still baffled and specutlate as to what this is? Female emotional and sexual denial are whole more complex bag!

Consumerism and materialism is all about impressing male peers and a genderless society for men, anything illusions you or anyone has that it isn’t is fucked. Durden is borne of sexual inadequecies and the emotional missing pieces … the narrator could never have been with Marla unless Tyler existed… all true male qualities had disappeared from Jacks life or consequenetly were never there… without Durdens immaturity & childishness (from this spawn all positive masculine traits) there could have been no relationship.

All we know is the narrator hated his father, all porblems stem from this, his life, mind and sex life is fucked because of it

The movie wasn’t that good, light slapstick entertainemnt… basically you can take any crap work of fiction and discet it and make a graduate english lit thesis out of it…. well, I can… don’t know about you!

What about this, that Tyler Durden was in fact the narrators relationship that he never had with his father ?? HIs father was a womaniser, used to beat him up, larger than life perosnality like Durden ?? It’s what is NOT talked about or covered in the book where the answers lie.

Food for thought.

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Flight plan was an unexpectably worst for me. Actually I like Jodie Foster and Sean Bean, but the movie made me fall sleep. Thank god I watch it for free!!