We just returned from Bavaria and the Mosel River valley. My wife was very concerned about what to wear. Her concerns were totally unnecessary. Here are the major fashion trends we observed among German tourists:

1)Males teenage to early 20’s: New York Yankees baseball cap; baggy blue jeans; shirts with odd geometric designs preferably of a very glossy, shiny material.

2)Females teenage to early 20’s: Hair either extremely curly or extremely straight; bell bottom trousers very tight from below the knee to waist; exposed midrif, especially if girl is fat; crocheted top.

3) Males over 30: NOTE: The former requirement that black socks be worn with sandals is apparently no longer in force. Now either white or black socks with sandals will do. Pedal pusher or clam digger pants or very short shorts that are very tight around the hips; any kind of sleeveless shirt, especially if of some very shiny material (see #1 above).

4) Females over 30: Frumpy dresses; overdone hair; high heels for climbing to see the local castle.

Don’t worry about what to wear in Germany unless you are into the dating/club scene.

God, the beer was so good.